Hhh I already know this post is going to start drama because discourse is rampant when it comes to this but I feel like posting about it anyways because it really bothers me.
I've had this discussion with a lot of people, and we all generally feel the same. A lot of mlm and nblm people feel like we aren't really able to keep our safe spaces. First we used the label gay to define us, but then that label became a general label for anyone who was attracted to their gender, and the rainbow flag was a general symbol now, so mlm and nblm didn't have their own flag or label at this point.
So we created vincian with a flag to define us but guess what? Apparently that was problematic too. For 1, the vincian flag was intended to be a vincian flag the whole time. Yeah the first version of it was a recolour, but the rest of them were original and supposed to be flags for gay men THE WHOLE TIME.
It feels like we're not allowed to have our own spaces without getting berated about it. Some wlw and nblw take it a bit far too by saying things like "get well soon" to mlm and nblm people. we should be allowed to have our own spaces instead of people just... not liking us. Even small things like "but women tho" when mlm are talking about their attraction to men is just upsetting because the thing is that we aren't talking about women, we're talking about men, and we should have a safe place to do that without other people coming in.
We just want a safe space in the community like everyone else, but we barely have that.