Hi. Sorry for not replying sooner I didn't see this.
Firstly, don't attempt to use my identity to gaslight me into agreeing with you. I don't have to agree with you just because we are both BIPOC. If you want to convince me that I'm somehow discriminating against myself by calling myself a non-man, you need to use actual arguments instead of manipulation tactics.
You claim that ‘many BIPOC have criticised the definition’, but where are they? By claiming that are implying that this view is common but as a person who seeks out spaces with other BIPOC sapphics I’ve never heard anyone say this apart from you. It sounds like you are overstating the popularity of your belief that the nmlnm definition is Eurocentric.
The idea that it is also seems to be based on misconceptions about the Lesbian Separatist movement of the 70s-80s. Lesbian feminists never used the ‘non-men attracted to non-men” definition used today, so this current definition has nothing to do with Lesbian Separatism. The definitions they used for lesbian were actually very vague and didn’t exclude BIPOC. (Lesbian Separatism was inspired by Black separatism, so the ‘separatism’ part of the name actually refers to separating from wider society not to excluding people). Some Lesbian Separatists were also BIPOC, such as the members of the Combahee River Collective, (the most longevous Lesbian Separatist group), so arguing Lesbian Separatism excluded BIPOC people anyway is absurd.
In short you are wrong to say the definition is 1. Eurocentric, 2. Anything to do with Lesbian separatism.