I'm one of the admins over on the new LGBTQIA+ Wiki.
I'm also a social worker. While I can't provide ongoing assistance to anyone here, I know that some of you are struggling with these things right now, have in the past, or may in the future. I hope this will be helpful to you.
If you or someone you know needs urgent assistance with the matters below, Fandom has a compilation of prevention resources. Someone who is experiencing the urges described below does not necessarily mean someone is considering s//cide, but it is a crisis situation that needs support.
Disclaimer:
Below is a list of things to do instead of cutting, burning, bruising, or any other form of self-harm. Please keep in mind that unfortunately, not everything on this list will work for everyone. So, if you try something and it doesn't work for you, don't get discouraged! Some of these choices are complicated, and you might want to utilize the help of a therapist or trusted friend when undertaking them. Recovery is not a process that can be walked through alone, so don't be afraid to reach out for help. This list originated with a now-offline forum post that circulated several years ago, but it has been edited.
Preparing for the possibility of feeling this way in the future:
Avoid situations that may trigger your urge to self-harm, especially when you are already triggered.
Protect yourself in advance by removing items you may use to self-harm. You may wish to have someone else keep them locked up.
Create a physical safe place to go when you have these feelings, and then go there whenever you need to. For instance, make yourself a cozy blanket nest.
Get your friends to make you friendship bracelets: wear them around your wrists to remind you of them when you want to cut.
Make your own list of things to do instead of self-harm. Refer to the list when you need to.
Thoughts that may help you when you feel like harming yourself:
Remember: you don't have to hurt yourself just because you're thinking about self-harm. Your thoughts do not have to become your actions. Having a thought about doing something does not mean you have to do it.
Remember yourself that you always have the choice not to cut: it's up to you what you do.
Acknowledge that self-harming behaviors are about feelings in the moment and that the behavior harms you. Acknowledge how you feel: "I want to hurt myself", rather than "I want to cut" (the specific action you are thinking about doing).
Be kind to yourself. Repeat to yourself: "I don't deserve to be hurt" even if you don't believe it.
Tell yourself, "I'll self-harm in 15 minutes if I still want to." Keep going every 15 minutes until the urge fades. Congratulate yourself on each minute you go without self-harming.
Instead of punishing yourself by self-harming, punish yourself by not allowing yourself to self-harm.
Remind yourself about how you feel after self-harming, such as how you don't want scars or feel guilty afterward.
Remind yourself that the urge to self-harm is impulsive: you will only feel like cutting for short bursts of time, and it will pass.
Actions that may help:
Be with other people, virtually or in person. Being around someone else can make it more difficult to harm yourself.
Put a bandage on or wrap bandage tape around the area(s) where you'd like to self-harm.
Kiss the places you want to hurt or kiss the places you have healing wounds. It can be a reminder that you care about yourself and that you don't want this.
The Butterfly Project—draw a butterfly on the place(s) that you would self-harm and if the butterfly fades without self-harming, it means it has lived and flown away, giving you a sense of achievement. If you do self-harm with the butterfly there, you will have to wash it off. If that does happen, you can start again by drawing a new one. You might name the butterfly after someone you love to remind you of them, or have a loved one draw it for you.
Write the name of a loved one [a friend, family member, or anyone else who cares about you] where you may want to self-harm. When you feel like harming yourself, look at their name and remember how much they care and wouldn't want you to be hurt.
Think about what you would say to a friend who was struggling with the same things you are and try to be a good friend to yourself. Tell yourself what you would tell your friend.
Make a chain link out of paper to count the hours or days you've been self-harm-free.
Make a bracelet out of duct tape or another study material, and draw a line on it every day, hour, or other period of time you go without self-harm. Save every bracelet you make. When a bracelet is full of lines, take it off. Make a chain with the other bracelets and hang it up somewhere where you can be reminded of your great progress.
On a sketch or photo of yourself, or an outline of a body, mark in red ink what you want to do. Cut and tear the picture.
Alternatives that will give you a sensation (other than pain) without harming yourself:
Hold ice in your hands, against your arm, or in your mouth.
Run your hands under freezing cold water. (Don't use hot water since it could burn you.)
Drink freezing cold water.
Splash your face with cold water.
Take a cold bath.
Take a hot (but not scalding/burning hot) shower/bath.
Snap a rubber band or hair band against your wrist.
Clap your hands until it stings.
Wax your legs.
Put Elmer's glue or similar on your hands, then peel it off.
Massage the places where you want to hurt yourself.
Jump up and down to get some sensation in your feet.
Write or paint on yourself.
Bite into a hot pepper, chew a piece of ginger root, or eat something else that's spicy.
Rub liniment under your nose.
Put Tiger Balm/Icy Hot/Bengay/other muscle relaxant cream on the places you want to cut (tingly-hot).
Alternatives that give the illusion of seeing something similar to blood:
Draw on yourself with a red pen, washable marker, body paint, or washable paint
"Cut" your skin by painting with nail polish (it feels cold, but it's hard to get off)
Make "wounds" with makeup, like lipstick or lip pencil.
Take a small bottle of liquid red food coloring and warm it slightly by dropping it into a cup of hot water for a few minutes. Uncap the bottle and press its tip against the place you want to cut. Draw the bottle in a cutting motion while squeezing it slightly to let the food color trickle out.
Draw on the areas you want to cut using red ice. You can make it by adding six or seven drops of red food coloring in each section of an ice cube tray.
Give yourself a henna or fake tattoo.