Tw: swearing, mentioning of genit@ls
Notes: Mate is drink with a lot of caffeine. I wrote this poem/poetry slam while I was extremely awake from said caffeinated drink. It's mainly baout me coming out and then it morphes into random thoughts about this guy who likes me but I don't think i like him back.
Here u go
this jittery feeling
the chaos in my mind
thoughts chasing through my brain
mate isn’t keeping me sane
too much anxiety to sleep
too much euphoria to breathe
too many feelings
keeping me awake
but oh for God’s sake
isn't it easy?
just a little step i want to take
one that might change me
but only for the better
so why can’t i do it?
i’m sitting at my laptop
writing these lines
caffeine making a mess inside
but i cannot stop
stop thinking about me
thinking about you
thinking about how i’m thinking about you
knowing you’re thinking of me too
two doesn’t equal us
and us has different meanings too
you think of us as lovers
that’s not how i see you
and it’s between us
and maybe i’m just a puss
a puss for not being with you
or is that just my truth?
I don’t see us that way
because clearly i might be very gay
and there’s not much more to say.
23:31 18.05.2021